Un Bel Di: One Fine Day (It'll Be My Turn)

"My decision has been made," says he.

And with one sentence, everything has been determined. I have nowhere to turn back to. Because the decision has been made.

With nowhere to turn, I am forced to go forward and hope for better things. Isn't it the same at every stop in life? Isn't it the same in every travel experience, when we encounter accommodation failures (hotels are full, hostels are full), and you just have to keep going to see if the next one has a room available. Hey, Mary and Joseph sure did the travelling ... went forward when they were turned away. They did it; why shouldn't we? We don't know where we're going, but we know exactly how to get there ... just keep moving forward.

"It's not the end of the world," says he. "I know you'll be fine."

He's right. My world will still go on. I will still wake up in the morning, thinking, "What? It's time to get up already?" I will still check the news, MySpace, Facebook and IMs when I get up. I will still smell the coffee, look up the sky, run in the rain if it's a rainy day, or put my hat and sunglasses on if it's sunny. I will still want to help people, do my best to make their lives better. I will still talk, laugh, be curious, travel, sing, dance, dream, hope, write, read, learn, love, be pissed off, have self-respect, be flawed, be empathetic, be a friend, be a daughter, sister, cousin, grand-daughter, student, member of society ... be me. I will still have my aspirations, my friends and my family. I will still want more to life.

And I will still wonder if there is someone out there who wants me. Maybe there is someone who needs me, loves me more than I do myself, supports, understands and accepts me, and is perfect for me in practically every way ... waiting for me.

Stop the tears. One day, it will be my turn.